Im so tempted to put this incident on paper, i'm nearly ignoring its ribald nature. But with some concealing here and there, i might be able to express the tension of the situation, i found myself sometime ago.

I dont know about my big city, or second metro cousins. But my small town or suburd brethren would agree that puberty reaches us damn boys, after a vacation in the French Riveira. School means friends & pranks and sometime for academics. Home....wash/bath....milk....and then its that crazy foot game and/or that damn club'n'ball game which engages us. Back at home, lecture from guardians, wash and then some amount of serious book stuff. Life in reality, should i say is 'simple' or 'uncomplicated'.

As if thats not too good, someone someplace talks to you about a nude women, he saw someplace. And suddenly, something happens. And when this 'something happens', some external organs of your body, you paid (really) least attention to, start acting weird. 'Is that normal?' you ask a senior. And he barks out 'Isko abhi pata chala(he just got to know about it!!)', amidst a downpour laughter and ridicules. And some enlightened shows you a trailer of some of the most gorgeous fair skinned beauties, you'd ever....thought of, ya thought of is the word. Its a magazine and isn't for sale or rent.

And then, the resident pervert in good boy's clothing, invites a bunch of wannabes to his place for a video film, supposed to ignite one's senses. And you make the usual 'football selctions' excuse, met by absolute disgust and numerous deadlines. Somehow after the last lecture, which aptly happens to be Chemistry, you fly down to the meeting place. And there you see a live case study, of what Ms Dsouza explained in 40 seconds in the Anatomy class. If only Ms Dsouza could make it sooooo interesting......anyways, dazed you return. Mom is concerned....she knows and yet she doesnt, what the issue is.(How do Ma's do that?) Anyways, you try and concentrate on Physics but the oscillating pendulum gives you ideas, move on to Biology and cell reproduction mixes up your newly learnt concept of reproduction.....you say to yourself 'Algebra is numbers' and lo and behold.....finally the quadratic equation does the trick.....Algebra is such a big leveler.

The incident that i wanted to share is kinda funny if explained verbally.....so as usual i take up a challenge to make things funny and forget that futility is word that exists in the dictionary!

"Did you know that Ravi has jammed Showgirl & Jane?" said Rocks.

"Jammed? When did he learn to play the guitar?" I remarked.

"Nahi ray....jammed jammed", showing the boot-polish gesture, insanely.

"Rocks....yaar be clear for once!"

"Andy....remember the video and deduce, will you?"

"Ah cmon Rocks....thats not possible. I mean no.....none of the girls would allow this. And when does he have the time? And the kinda of stuff i saw, you need a teacher for that!"

"Andy, its a private matter....nobody teaches you that stuff. And yes Ravi gave them a shot each."

"Shot! Whats that? If i deduce again, thats not possible. I mean Jane isnt that kinda girl. I know her"....i kinda liked Jane, you know and it really hurt to hear such things.

"Andy....it had to come, today or tommorow. It couldnt have gone the way it was going for the past few months. It would have pained a bit, but no gain without pain, i guess."

"Rocks stop talking shit, alright. I'm off....i cant take this balderdash(just read the word meaning in the English Class). I cant believe you could be so lewd...sayonara."

"Lewd? What does that mean eitherways?"

I was feeling bad....Jane of all people. And at age 14. I mean...give me a break. I met her at the gate.....and whaddya know, she had a grin on her face. Sinister sizzler....i'll get you for this.....i'd jam Rinki(if i got a chance) and grin back at you....na, i cant be that bad. I smiled back and carried on home.

I didnt go to play that day....i was miserable. I gargled with milk, when Ma wasnt around.....cousin Amit told me that it freshens you up...some quack he! Finally, i decided i'd walk down to Ravi's place and give him a peice of my mind.

"Ravi Ravi....come out please. Auntie, Ravi's there?" I didnt visit him much.....he was the elite class you see....bungalow shungalow, pool, Mahindra Jeep etc. We were "hi.. bye" type friends in school....but at talking terms all the same.

"I'll call him Beta....You his friend? Ah, from school....never seen you before. Why dont you comein?....Ravi Ravi...your friend's here."

I could hear deafening barks, rising in magnitude from inside the house. I suffer from acute Cynophobia and would have pee'ed in my pants, but my civilised upbringing stopped that act. Altough in leashes, Ravi's Dob's looked like the hounds that tried to pull Gregory Peck down at the cemetary in 'The Omen'..(i had taken a leak after that scene).

"Ravi i have something imporatnt to tell you"

Bow bow bow bow......"Go on Andy"

"Ravi........" Bow bow bow...."Ravi......" Bow bow bow

"Dont mind them Andy.....they are invigorated today. I gave them a 'shot' each. What a booster?"

I would've fainted. I dont remember what i did next, but i did run home and slept.

"Rocks ....i guess you were right. I'd never thought Ravi'd be such a pervert?"

"Pervert....what are you talking about?"

"He gave his Dogs a......" I was cut short by Rocky, who noticed Ravi alighting from his jeep at the school gate. "Hey Ravi...how are Showgirl & Jane doing....the shots helped i heard. Tell you what, you've got a pair of beauties!"

" You bet....Showgirl & Jane are the best Dogs i've ever got....and the vaccination shots, they sure helped."

Would you believe it.....the vaccination video.....damn Dogs. But 'shot' is a word i used widely from then on....college was about to happen and a chance to know the real THING.....kinda nostalgic, you see.